Dear Editor:

Re: Turtle trouble turns nasty, Burnaby NOW, Sept. 26.

Ah yes, the "Turtle Mitigation Plan" - long on the books but only recently referred to - seems to be hurtling forward towards its denouement at a turtle's pace.
The dredgers sit idling and ready, though not, alas, the turtles, and all this unbeknownst to our "green" mayor, who now appears to have only a thin patina of that colour, not unlike the eponymous lake denizen. Will this be described as an amphibious assault or more of a reptilian manoeuvre?

The mayor, according to media reports, tells of anecdotal evidence from pioneer Burnabians (Burnabers? Burnabites?), including the near-mythical Bill Copeland, that the painted turtle is not even native to the area (and looking around me, I find few of us who are.)

Liberal MLA Barry Penner claims that the mayor is either (a) asleep at the switch, or (b) forgetting facts. I prefer the former as it is so much more visual than the latter, though less alliterative.

The mayor's contention that "Everybody in the Western world has known about the dredging of Burnaby Lake" leaves me wondering if I am awakening from a lengthy coma and why it fails to excite me either way, even at this late date.

Larry Bennett,

Burnaby